"Hy-Vee: Where there's a loaded gun in every aisle"

Hy-Vee corporate headquarters detail.

My favorite headline so far this week: "Shop Hy-Vee: Where there's a loaded gun in every aisle."

Some may not be familiar with our favorite grocer's former theme song --- "Where there's a helpful smile in every aisle" --- which had the double advantage of rhyme and non-violence.

It's all related to the retail giant's recent announcement of plans to launch a fully armed and uniformed corporate paramilitary force to patrol the aisles of its stores; presumably that would include Chariton's.

The idea, according to a corporate spokesperson, is to offer up the guards as a "visual deterrent." But a heavily armed one.

So in addition to masks to protect ourselves from the 60 percent of unvaccinated Lucas Countyans, body armor now may be needed to protect ourselves from stray bullets while shopping those once friendly aisles.

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And then there's the Republican-controlled Iowa Legislature, about to launch itself loopily into the new year of 2022.

The Des Moines Register reports, "Iowa businesses would not be able to ask about or maintain records of a person's medical treatment status — including vaccinations — under details of a bill that a group of House Republicans announced Tuesday."  

Among other things, the bill would prevent vaccination status from being considered while hiring or firing, forbid a business from denying goods or services (and offering vaccination incentives) based upon vaccination status and prohibit mask requirements. The bill would apply widely, including to health care providers.

Carried to its logical extent, of course, mandatory drug testing programs used by most large-scale employers could be looked upon as an invasion of privacy, too. And what about all of those other pesky state regulations --- such as insisting that physicians be trained, qualified and licensed to practice?